Barbara Sher’s Idea Party

HotGetWhatYouWant_18_small

How Does the Online Idea Party Work?

You have a dream or a wish, and an obstacle to getting there. (If you don’t think you know your wish, work through my kick-starter and read this post. To learn why you must put logic aside to find your dream, read the following.)

The online Idea Party is here to help you – and the other fellow party goers – with your wishes and obstacles.

Voices from Success Teams and Idea Parties:

Having a team to report to and hearing what everybody did each week is very exciting. It’s kept me moving all year. In the past I made some good starts on my own, but found, every time, when the energy ran out, I ran out. Now it doesn’t run out.
Jade G.
Children’s Playroom Therapist, New York Hospital

I would do a painting a year, a sketch a year. If it was only me I know I would never do it. Having to tell you makes all the difference. It’s crazy why I didn’t do this years ago, it’s so easy all of a sudden.
Caroline R. Personnel Executive, Macy’s Dept Store

Post Your Wish and Your Obstacle Here!

And help your team mates out when you can. Use the Reply link to help, the form below the comments to add your own Wish and Obstacle.

(Your first comment below has to be approved, so it may not display instantly depending on the time of the day. Once your email address is approved you can post instantly. If you want your own profile photo to show up beside your comments, instead of the cute little design, upload your photo on Gravatar.com and give them an hour or so to make it happen.)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

4,433 thoughts on “Barbara Sher’s Idea Party

  1. My wish is to become an entrepreneur. I have many good ideas. I also have the right education, experience and expertise. However, I have severe case of ADHD. I am easily distracted and it takes me hours to get back to the task. I miss deadline and forget/neglect to follow up on the activities. I start many things and rarely complete anything. I do not have any employee who I can delegate the work (that’s how I managed in past while working as an employee in large organizations). Please help me!

    • As an entrepreneur with good ideas who has a relatively severe case of ADD, after many years I have to say that I don’t think you’ve got a chance without a assistant.

      The first smart things I did were to get a bookkeeper to handle every single bill and receipt. The second smart thing I did was hire an assistant who did not have ADD. The rest is history.

      Where did I get the money to pay them? I found one way or another to earn enough money to pay them. I still had enough free time (because of them) to do the design and creative work I was good at.

      Why don’t you have an assistant? Is it something you think only big companies have?

  2. Hello, I am an actress with a degrees from both Juilliard and NYU . Acting is my true passion. The past few years have been very hard. I suffered a severe spinal injury that required a spinal fusion and my Mother passed away of cancer and I gained a lot of weight . I am looking to get inspiration to get back into acting and to continue to audition although I am heavy Set now . I’m very depressed and I have no other artist friends who could inspire me, I feel I don’t have the resources to continue a career in acting and I feel too overweight to be cast in any worthy role plus I have no supporting friends .

    • Hi Rose,

      I deal with anxiety and depression, and my partner deals with depression as well. I can’t hand you an acting gig or a miracle cure, but I know I can at least offer an ear, and I can offer some perspective.

      So to summarize, here’s what I’m hearing:

      “I’m depressed, I’ve been going through a lot. I want to act again, I want great friends, and most of all I want to feel good about myself. I know getting back into acting would make me feel better and give me a way to make friends, but I’ve been out of it for a while and I feel like I have to start all over from scratch.”

      Good news is that you’re not starting from scratch. You already know what you’re passionate about, you already have two degrees in it. I know that being heavy set seems like an insurmountable obstacle right now, but being heavy set can’t prevent you from getting roles you aren’t auditioning for.

      So here’s what else I’m hearing:

      “Maybe acting isn’t for me anymore, or maybe I’m just not good enough to do it anymore”

      I don’t think either of those are true. I think all it takes to be a great anything, is to have put in the work, and you’ve already put in years worth of work. I think you just need to try out some new tools and some new approaches to get back on your feet.

      So what is your most immediate obstacle?
      Depression?
      Lack of resources?
      Lack of friends?
      Lack of inspiration?

      Each one can be dealt with if you break them down and set clear, actionable, time oriented goals. But you can’t deal with everything all at once. You have to break them down.

      Not feeling inspired? take a scene from a movie you love and work on acting it

      Don’t have supportive inspiring friends? Find a community online or in person of people you admire and put yourself in contact with them.

      Don’t have a network? make one by putting yourself in spaces where you can acquire those resources. Film festivals, artist venues, etc.

      Feeling very depressed? It’s complex, but you can break it down to diet, exercise, sleep, self-talk, time with yourself, relationships, and a handful of other things. A good first step would be to seek council with a psychologist, try out a couple even. I would recommend psychologists that emphasize either cognitive behavioral therapy, or some kind of action/goal oriented therapy. And if you’re really struggling, there’s no shame in medication. For some people it works miracles.

      If seeking council seems like too big of a first step, then just make a point to get out into the sunlight every morning. Just a small step like that can help immensely.

      I know it seems like a lot to deal with all at once, I don’t mean to make light of your feelings or situation, but I know you can do it. I’m sure that my solutions aren’t all the best fit for you, but I know you will find what works for you, if you look for it.

      Sincerely, and best wishes,
      Tanner

    • Regarding depression and weight, I would like to strongly encourage you to look into a whole foods plant based diet, with as much raw as possible. I switched to a raw food diet 2 years ago and it has changed my life. I believe it will help you find the inspiration within yourself. I know it’s hard, but commit to a month of whole foods and plants only, and see how you feel. You can always up the game with raw and more fruits later. Check out the new movie What The Health. Also, Forks Over Knives and Tannyraw on Youtube. They are great resources to get you started.

  3. I want to make ten professionally recorded albums. I have been a pro level singer, songwriter and performer since I was 20 (39 now) and I have made a couple records. But, my obstacle now is the idea of ‘fate’, ‘destiny’ or God pulling me in a different direction, introducing the idea that I no longer have a say in my future. This has caused me to stop practicing my singing in my pop style (at least I have been doing a lot of church singing. not all is lost.) I am very religious but I love my secular songs and style that I’m known for. I don’t want to be on my death bed and regret not having ‘taken the reins’ on my unique, playful style. I don’t want to give it up.

    • and also, I have three of these records already figured out. I’ve written all the songs and I want to sing on them. it just seems an awful lot of willpower is required to “fight” to realize these three dreams (the records). I don’t have anyone in my life burning the fire under my rear to help me make it happen. I want to find a community that shares my love and appreciation of all the great bands and artists out there… and can see how important it is that I make my music! I don’t want to go another year heeding a spiritual call but barely touching my own creative projects 🙁

  4. MY WISH: To be a life coach that helps people find their own authentic source of happiness.

    MY OBSTACLE: I can’t afford to advertise my business/website and so no one knows about me.

    • My website is HappyandAuthentic. com and my YouTube channel is HappyandAuthentic, if you’d like to check it out and see what kind of Life Coach I am. I call myself a Happiness Strategist.

  5. Wish: To attend this summer’s 2017 HYPNOTHOUGHTS LIVE Conference in Las Vegas including Seth Deborah Roth’s two-day Medical Hypnosis 2-day Certification pre-conference course.

    The entire event is August 23-27. Conference costs = $725 + 5 night hotel = (5 x $85) $425 + rt airfare from San Francisco = $140+/- TOTAL = $1,290.

    I am a hypnotherapist, but hesitantly practicing for no good reason. I recently underwent 2 1/2 hours of dental surgery with only my own 13-minute script read by a hypnotherapist peer, for anesthesia and I felt NO PAIN. I also used self-hypnosis to survive my arm’s healing itself from a three-fracture accident without any medical intervention. I know this works!
    However, I feel if I had the certification from Seth Deborah Roth’s course, it would give me both courage and entree into the medical community in San Francisco where Ms. Roth works also.
    In addition, the event is packed with dozens of seminars and attended by hundreds of hypnotherapist and hypnotist peers from across the country. I’m sure to learn lots, make valuable associations, and strengthen my confidence and marketing skills.

    Thank you to whoever reads this and has some helpful ideas or answers. I’d love to see over and beyond the boundaries that seem to separate me from this worthwhile endeavor. Just thinking that someone will read this and send me good wishes has lifted my spirits and faith in the evidence of things not (yet) seen. Appreciatively, A.T.

    • Is money the obstacle? I am going to list some ideas for that. If it is something else, let us know.

      * Instead of the hotel:
      – couch surfing.
      – contact the organizers and ask for locals who could host you for a lower price.
      – go to a hotel off-strip.
      – find someone else who is also going and offer to share a hotel room.
      – sleep at a youth hostel.

      * For the fee:
      – Contact the organizers and offer yourself as assistant.
      – Contact the organizers and ask for a grant.

      * Other ways to make money:
      – Ask relatives and friends to help you make your dream come true.
      – Offer hypnotherapy sessions!! It sounds like you have something to offer. Launch a special summer-2017-offer. Contact dentists, hospitals right away… Maybe going to that seminar is a motivation to get in motion with this?
      -Contact other hypnotherapists in your area and offer yourself as an assistant.
      – Save: actually I went to Las Vegas for a workshop many years ago (from Europe!) when I had _no_ money and one way was to save every cent by ordering small drinks or no drinks (I went everywhere with my water bottle) and thinks like that.
      – Sell stuff.
      – Make money with some other skill of yours.

    • Sounds like a business that doesn’t need much money to get started, right? Do you have an idea what you would need for starters? A website? That doesn’t cost much. A youtube channel? That’s for free. Let us know what you would need and we can find ways to get it low cost.

  6. As far back as I remember , I have wanted to help. Currently, I would like to find a way to make a livlihood helping people lead extraordinary lives through leading Success Teams.
    My obstacles are:
    – I have never experienced a Success Team so don’t really know if it is a fit
    – if it is, I don’t have the ready $$ to buy the kit
    – I lack confidence to go out there and promote Success a Teams
    – I am not sure people would invest $250-400 to go through the process (my own limiting beliefs about $)

    • People do invest that sort of money to go after their dreams, Laara, all the time. A new leader’s first team is done for free, with the leader as a member of the team, going after something she or he really wants. Achieving your own goal with the team’s support is a great way to find the confidence to invite others to do the same.

      So, is there some other goal you’d also like to go after, one that you could use to develop your confidence in the Success Teams process and your abilities as a leader?

      If so, your only obstacle is the money for the kit. If you can find a way to pick up an extra $60 every weekend (garage sales, mowing lawns, cleaning closets, cooking meals, walking dogs, whatever), you’ll be able to purchase the kit by mid-August. September and January are two of the easiest times of year to fill Success Teams.

      Patty Newbold, Director, Sher Success Teams

  7. My dream is to work professionally as a jazz singer. While I was growing up, my family thoroughly discouraged me from pursuing a music career. As an adult, anyone listening to me sing would say “you’ve missed your calling”. In 2006, I found a way to pursue my dream and started attending various classes and workshops. Up until November, 2014, I was making steady progress in studying music, singing at open mics and even started building a fan base. My main obstacle now is that I’ve been blacklisted and my character has been defamed. During my attendance at one workshop, I withstood several instances of sexual abuse and harassment. After being molested while watching a piano lesson, I finally complained very loudly. Not long after, I woke up to an entirely different world where I’m recognized by people I’ve never met and everyone expresses disgust toward me. No one will tell me what’s being said, or shown about me. Someone did discretely confirm that there is a Photoshopped image of me being circulated. I’m determined to realize my dream, but I’m stuck. I’m experiencing a lot of social anxiety because I don’t know what I’m up against or what to do about it.

    • Hi Laura, I hear the pain of this obstacle, and at the same time I’m thinking that surely I’m not the only person here who would love to see/hear a YouTube of you singing. My attention goes to what must be the majority of people in the world who have no concerns about what a group of people has chosen to think/say. Would you like to post a video here?
      Jane

      • Hi Jane,
        Thank you so much for your response. I would love to post a video here, even though I’ve never made one. My social anxiety is kicking up pretty hard as I’m writing this. But my excitement at the idea of making a video is stronger. If I can’t get a musician to accompany me, I’ll experiment with singing with a karaoke track, or singing a song a capella. Or maybe I’ll chance going to an open mic and having someone film me. This will probably take me a couple of weeks to figure out and finalize. I hope that will be alright.

        • Whenever it happens (and however!) is surely the right time and way. No pressures. I’m suspecting that passion and your responsibility to what REALLY matters will be the keys that open up this path. Go for it!

  8. I want to become an Image Consultant. I am extremely poor and my income barely lasts for a month. I need $7800 in order to join the Institute where they will teach me and give me a certificate to work as an Image Consultant.

    I have been chasing this dream since 2013 and several times I had given up. But your video ‘Isolation is the dream killer, not your attitude’ is what gave me a new hope.

    I am good at social media, I speak well in English even though its my second language, and I write well too. I do not want financial favors I just want to be able to get there.

    Thank you

    • Hi,
      I wonder where do you live, what type of work are you doing currently, how much access do you have to a computer , who your target audience is for consulting and when does the next class begin? Also, must you go full time or can you go part time?
      Without knowing any of the above, only that you speak two languages (at least), I can make one suggestion to earn extra money in your free time: go to italki.com and sign up to teach English speaking people to talk in your native tongue. You can work when you want and charge for the service. The fact that you speak English would give you a big advantage over others.
      Best of luck.

    • If I were you, I’d skip the Institute. That’s a lot of money, there’s no license required to announce yourself as an image consultant, and nobody who hires an image consultant will even look at a certificate — they’ll look at you and your most recent clients.

      You still need to learn about how to make money as an image consultant, but being poor is actually a bit of an advantage there. For any service business, you need to learn how to find clients and keep them coming back for more service. And the best way to learn this is actually to work for a service business. You don’t say where you are, but in the US, I’d recommend the Service Department of a BMW, Mercedes, or Lexus car dealership (because they must provide good service to high-paying customers to survive), a Neiman Marcus department store (because they provide fashion consulting while they sell clothes and teach employees about providing good service), a Coach leather goods store (good training on image and selling to the high-end customers likely to buy your image consulting service), or a successful interior decorator (because they sell image consulting of a sort to the same folks you’ll want as customers).

      You also need to learn about the business side of running a business, paying taxes, etc., so once you get a job like this, be sure to get to know the owner, the manager, and the finance officer and ask lots of questions about what it takes beside sales and good service to keep a business going.

      Also befriend your co-workers, because it’s likely they will have worked for other businesses selling services to high-income customers, and they can tell you what those other businesses do that’s different and how well it works.

      In your spare time, you’ll want to interview people who can advise you on what’s important to image consulting for different groups of clients. For those who appear on TV, a cameraman or director working on the morning show at your local TV station, the nightly news, or even your local Public Television station can give you great tips.

      For consulting to those who speak for a living, go to meetings of your local chapter of the National Speakers Association and ask everyone you meet what they’ve discovered that works for their image and what doesn’t. They can also tell you what’s different about the image needs of a speaker as opposed to a corporate exec, as they get to work with lots of execs.

      For consulting to political candidates, volunteer with the Republicans or Democrats and talk to the folks who’ve been doing this a while about image and politics.

      For consulting to the high society set, volunteer with any organization that does big ticket fundraisers and get yourself assigned to work at a few of these. You may not be able to do as many interviews, but you’ll learn lots just by observing.

      You don’t need a lot of equipment for this job, but consider visiting mill end shops to buy inexpensive squares of fabric in lots of colors (to see what looks best with your clients’ skin tone and hair color) and in a variety of fibers, textures, and drape, so you can educate your clients.

      And get some business cards printed as soon as you can. Your Gravatar image is lovely enough that you should definitely include your photo on them. In the US, VistaPrint is one of the least expensive sources, and as soon as you buy a few cards, they’ll send you nonstop discount offers on more cards or anything else you might need.

      When you’re starting out, you probably won’t be able to support yourself doing this full-time, but consider moving to where your customers live, even if it means working as a live-in nanny, housekeeper, or home health care aide. You’ll be able to post ads for free in local shops and on craigslist and show up at local events.

      Really successful image consultants make a lot of money. And people who succeed at any service business do it by understanding how service businesses succeed and bringing their innate talents to the job.

      Skip the Institute. Use that money to buy yourself a great wardrobe for your consulting gigs. And good luck.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.