Refuse to Choose!: What I Learned

Go back over each of the exercises in your Daybook and each of your What I Learned comments here online. We’ve been at this for four months. Some of what you learned probably already seems old hat. Maybe some of it you’ve already forgotten. To get the most out of the book and our book club, take the time for a careful review and write yourself some notes on what you most want to remember.

It would be wonderful if you shared your notes here with the rest of us. You will renew our attention to something we overlooked or confirm the importance and value of what we will take away with us.

Please be sure to subscribe to future comments on this exercise or to check back here on Wednesday evening or Thursday morning for new ones.

Use the Next link (up above the title) to continue on to Refuse to Choose: How I Changed after you are done adding your comments.

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2 thoughts on “Refuse to Choose!: What I Learned

  1. I reviewed my Daybook entries. I reviewed our submissions to this site.
    I noticed shared challenges with many of you: depression, struggling, perfection, getting rid of things
    I read your replies differently eleven weeks later.

    I found two ways of thinking in my life. I grouped them as my initial way of thinking and what I found from our exercises with some tension between the two – a paradox or a shift.

    Examples

    organize my home so it’s safe to leave home or be anywhere
    grind out a solution to a problem or discover that someone else solved it
    wish for ideal communication technology or communication with available tools
    do things for money because they’re hard for others and get bored or work on things that are hard for me for the rewards of joy and sensation
    playing basketball with others and not taking many shots or working by myself on making baskets
    snowboarding on my own or prioritizing my kids’ activities
    marriage or free
    dividing my time across unenjoyable tasks or doing everything i really want to do
    worrying about what others will think or following my own whims
    focusing on love/marriage, our home, and work or on my health and kids
    feeling lost or finding guidance in pain
    pursuing perfect or finding resilience
    trying to do all the things / every idea or only focusing on The things until I lose interest
    what i think i want or what i really want
    trying to figure it out or sleep
    addressing pain or following joy
    a career or a life
    kids or myself
    my wife understanding me or me understanding me
    frozen or methodical / free to live slow
    too much or filtered priorities
    plate spinner / perfection / distraction or prioritized on dreams
    parenting children or learning from children, continuing our own parenting and learning about nervous systems
    needing my wife to be different or enjoying my wife as she is
    the way i am or the way i want to be
    needing friends or enjoying friends

    is struggle necessary for processing hindrances?
    is a crash necessary for change?

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